For entertainment purposes only. Not to be taken seriously.
My theory of how we evolved to who and what we are now.
One day, a few years ago, maybe a few million or more years ago, there was this single cell something just hanging out at the local single cells' sand bar; waiting for some other single cell something to come in for some entertainment; and maybe a little something more, if you know what i mean.
Sure enough, after a mere millennium or ten, this really buff single cell something came floating in on the early morning tide.
Because, ya know, even back then there were tides.
Well this second single cell something just sort of floated around a bit, getting a feel for the place. Soon though, the first single cell something drifted over and slithered its slithery single cell all over the second single cell something's single cell.
So then, ya see: these two single cells discussed what they could do to liven things up for any possible future generations of single cell somethings.
Unaware that their single cell brains were too stupid to recognize or care what kind of chaos their little dance fest (to put it politely) would cause, several millions of years in the future.
They were far too busy enjoying the wild sensations that mingling their single cell something body fluids was giving them. They were so caught up in these new and wonderful feelings that they never even noticed the strange thing that was happening. These two single cell somethings were no longer separate single cells. They had melded. They were now a single double celled something. And when other single cell somethings saw what these two had done, they thought it was good and went ahead and mingled their single cell body fluids and of course we all know that they too melded and became single double cell somethings.
This slithery activity caught on big time, and soon all the singles were doubles. They looked around and noticed there were no more single cell somethings to get mingly and slithery with, so they decided to see what might happen if they slithered and mingled their double cell selves. And they saw that it was good.
So good in fact,
That to this day, mingling body fluids, and getting slithery, is one of humanity's greatest pleasures.
All because, even all that time ago, common sense became much less common, when these single cell somethings got together for a slithery, mingly good time.
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